Have you ever heard of relationship attachment styles?
According to psychologists, attachment styles are formed in early childhood and play a major role in how we attach to others in our relationships later in life. Our attachment style determines things like whether we feel anxious when someone leaves us, fearing abandonment, or feel more comfortable with less closeness because we are somewhat avoidant of relationships to begin with.
This post is about how relationship attachment styles, which can help us understand how we show up and react in relationships, can also help us understand how we are with money.
Knowing your relationship attachment style can be hugely helpful in understanding how you feel and function in your relationships, particularly romantic ones. (I’ve personally used knowing and understanding my relationship attachment style to switch from being anxiously attached to what psychologists call “earned secure attachment”, but more on that in another blog post!)
This blog post is about your relationship to money, and here’s how I got there…
Recently, I started thinking about what I know about how to have a really good romantic relationship (something I’ve worked at for awhile)- and applying that to how I relate to money.
What no one ever told me, but that I recently realized is this: How I FEEL about money is actually an attachment style too.
Whether I know it or not, I am actually in a RELATIONSHIP with MONEY – all the time.
If we want to have a good relationship with money, almost all of the principles of a generally good relationship apply.
What makes a good relationship? Things like: trust, openness, mutuality, respect, security, and intimacy.
But do we ever think to apply these values to our relationship with money? Usually not.
So, what if we took all of these characteristics of a good, solid, stable relationship with a partner and applied it to money?
Think about that for a minute and really let it sink in. What if money were a stable, trustworthy, reliable, consistently available source for you – much like a stable and loving partner?
How different would that feel? Immensely different, at least for most of us.
In this video blog, I talk about taking these positive relationship characteristics and how to apply them one by one money so that you can change your whole money approach.
No more clinginess. No more lack. No more “wanting” something you can’t have. (These are such turn-offs, aren’t they?). When we approach money in this way, it energetically responds the way any partner would – by avoiding us.
But, when we approach money with confidence, security and trust – it also responds accordingly.
It is amazing that when we change our energy around money, it changes its response to us.
And this is something YOU can do. You can start applying these principles RIGHT NOW in your own life.
Because money is responding to your energy and your expectations- just like a partner would in any and every relationship.
I want to just leave you with this idea that you can expect more of money. You can trust money. Money can be reliable for you. You can have an amazing relationship with money.
Watch the full video blog for more and leave a comment below! I love to hear from you.
XOXO
Nicole
